The Crop Top Challenge

On Wednesday I posted about how I was cranking up the challenge I set myself in January. Well if you don't know anything about that then basically I've always desired to have the guts to flash my 'mum tum'. I've lost weight, toned up but I still look and see so many imperfections. My aim is to help as many women, mums in particular feel good about themselves and embrace good health. To do that I thought I needed to make sure I exercised plenty and stuck to a healthy eating plan and share that. Until recently it hit me hard that those two ingredients aren't the only recipe for good health. More importantly is self worth, pride, respect, confidence, self-esteem the list is endless. You could be absolutely beautiful with a body to die for, but if you feel low when you look in the mirror then sadly your really not that healthy at all despite how hard you work on exercise or nutrition. You haven't paid any attention to your mental health and that's equally as important. I probably sound like a broken record repeating this, but you have to learn to love yourself. I'll hold my hands up and say I'm rubbish at this, until now. Today, right now as I'm typing this post I'm making a commitment to stop worrying about how I look or how I'm perceived and embrace any imperfections. Today I've decided to be proud of all I've achieved with trying to get fit and step out my comfort zone and achieve a goal of mine. The confidence to feel that good that I'd be able to flash my tummy. With the exception of the odd beach trip with just  my nearest and dearest it's something I haven't done since becoming a mum. Something I didn't really know if I'd ever do again. Something so simple, but something I get jealous of when I see others having the confidence and frame to do so. I've been beating myself up, telling myself "I haven't got the figure to do it", but the truth is I'm exhausted trying to get to perfect. It's not achievable, so do I give up on my goal or do I think screw it and embrace the pear shape, the stretch marks, the little wobble and bare all. You've guessed it, this crazy lady is getting her mid-section out. Eeeeeekkkkkk! Actually terrified!, but I know it's the final piece to good health to just be contented with how I am.  Contented that's all I crave. Sounds bliss, simple but perfect. 

So the new challenge isn't a photo-shoot (although I'm still hoping to do that at some point, saving some pennies up 1st), but now I'm actually making the challenge bigger. Nope, instead I'm challenging myself to do 'Race For Life' in a crop top. The thought alone is utterly worrying. All those insecurities start creeping back in, 'What if people think what on earth is she wearing, she hasn't got a good tummy for an instructor, she must love her self to wear that' and so on. The concerns come in thick and fast. However that's exactly why I need to do it. I'm utterly fed up of feeling that way. Feeling miserable following beautiful fitness professionals  and desiring to be them. Their confidence, their beauty and that attitude of I'm comfortable in my own skin. I want my slice of that. That isn't coming from losing more weight, getting any more toned but from acceptance  of the fact I am a mum now, I'm not 18 but actually I'm fine how I am. In fact I'm healthier and fitter than ever. I'm just guilty of one thing. I focus way too much on media perfection than reality. Reality is I've worked really hard to get into shape and I may not ever get any better. Reality is I need to love the skin I'm in because it maybe the best I'll ever achieve and that's fine. So I'm facing reality head on and instead of accepting my flaws I'm gonna love them anyway. I'm going to fight my insecurities and put my fingers up to' I don't look good enough to wear that' and do it anyway. It's the start of my journey to be satisfied as I am.

Work it Baby is something I'm so passionate about and having my own team for Race For Life is something that makes me want to burst with pride, but I'm sick of preaching to others about loving themselves when I'm frightened to love myself. It feels almost uneasy, cringey, perhaps ignorant, big headed to do so. What will others think?! Will they see vanity if I learn to love myself? How great it must feel to not worry about that. So that's enough of it. End of. I'm working on a chapter of not needing approval. Sod approval.  Screw it for a barrel of laughs as I'm going to love myself enough to pluck up the courage to do this. See you at Race For Life in my crop top. I believe when you aren't trapped by fear, your free. It's time for me to pluck up some courage. 5 weeks to go and counting *deep breaths*. I can do this!

Wish me luck and be kind about my display :P 

Goodbye Depression, Goodbye Binge Eating

Eeeekkk so my last two posts were both over a month ago where I opened up about depression and binge eating. That time has flew by and I've just spent the last month beavering away and focusing on overcoming the two and not worrying about blog posts or other tasks but, just taking a break and just really focusing on health 1st and foremost. As soon as I did those posts I immediately felt liberated. I felt they were both so ridiculous, and so since then I'm been working on just being happy, but healthy (I'm feeling much better on the whole).  Shockingly though the binge eating has been the bigger challenge out of the two, but I'm almost there. Once I feel like I've completely kicked butt with that problem, I'll post my tips but I haven't quite got there yet....close, but not mission accomplished shall we say. I've had a few hiccups along the way, but I' m determined so I know I'll be able to post that blog when I'm ready. I'm not going to put any pressure on myself as I want to learn the process and grow from my experiences. I'm just finding the right balance now between healthy eating and not feeling deprived leading to a rebellious binge.

As for the depression, well I'm not so sure. There are days when I feel fine, good in fact and whilst I don't want to jinx in it there has been more good days than bad recently. Yay! I really feel like there is definitely a massive link between binge eating and the depression as battling the binge has definitely lifted my mood. For those of you that know my not so secret secret I've I've also had a internal and external ultrasound scan which picked up on Polycystic Ovaries, which can also be linked with depression. From what I'm reading (google-ing, it's never good - sometimes I convince myself I'm dying :p), there is links between Polycystic Ovary Syndrome and your mood/depression. The advice is to eat healthy and keep naughty sugars in check. The thing is when I eat less of these foods I do feel better, now I also know it's even more important for my health it makes it more paramount than ever to keep it up. I definitely feel between the depression, binge eating to the Polycystic Ovaries there is a lot of linkage between them all. 

The stupid thing is one of the reasons I got myself in this situation was due to worrying how I was always perceived by others. Stressing myself out and trying to always be better. Never just being OK with what I'd achieved or learnt.  The business which I loved was affected, I lost my way and my confidence as well as members. I literally felt like I'd been hit by a brick wall and that was it, the business was ending and it was just a matter of time. So I decided to go out on with a bang, to stop worrying if people didn't like me, my class, or felt I didn't look in good shape but to just enjoy it encase it might be the last. Funnily enough when I let all my worries go, because I felt I had nothing more to give things got better. Business is going well, don't get me wrong I have a long way to go but all in all things are going very well. Lots of amazing feedback , classes are getting full and I have plans for expansion. Who'd of thought it! My confidence is gradually increasing and I've set myself a HUGE challenge to overcome my physical insecurity demons left in the closet. When I say HUGE I mean it's not big as in noticeable to the world big deal, but to me on a personal level it's enormous. Let's just say the challenge I set myself in January has been cranked up a notch! 

I'm putting to bed my worries, other people's comments, the past and putting the final piece of the jigsaw in place to be healthy. 

Will post my new challenge asap, before I back out :P 

Angry Binge Eating

Go back 5 years ago and I lived on junk food and now I really try to eat well, but I don't find it easy. So much so that my low mood has lend me to pig out on loads of processed crap. I love the rubbish. You know when you can taste the badness it's bliss, food heaven! Unfortunately 10 minutes later and it's all gone and your left feeling guilty and ashamed about how much crap you've wolfed down for pure greed not hunger. This has been me recently. I've starting binge eating. Being an instructor I feel it's my duty to be a role model and to lead by example.  I've said it before but I'll say it again and probably again after that, but I really believe in practising what you preach, so I feel like I've failed everyone. I believe in eating healthy and exercising but the knowing and having the knowledge of what's good for you is the easy part, the doing takes much more.

The truth is becoming an instructor has been one of the best things I've ever done for my health, without it I truly believe I'd be overweight now. Even when I was trying to be healthy I was getting it so wrong and it would of only been a matter of time before it caught up on me. However being overweight doesn't necessary mean your really unhealthy, but in my case it would of been. I was just eating rubbish sometimes knowingly , but other times I had no idea in was in fact bad what I was consuming. You get people of a healthy weight believing they are healthy because of their size, but in fact they are perhaps that frame because they are quite active or don't overeat but they are actually not that healthy at all. The same goes for overweight people sometimes what they eat isn't that bad, they just perhaps don't move enough or eat too much of it. Being an instructor meant I became fascinated in nutrition and overtime I made better choices and lifestyle changes so that's a real blessing and I owe the business a huge thank you for that. The problem is being an instructor has also been a massive burden. If I'm passionate about something then I become a perfectionist about it. Being perfect at something isn't attainable. Your just asking for trouble. Then if your me you need to throw into the mix your battling depression and the fact your angry your plans haven't quite worked out as they were suppose to and before you know it your an angry binge eater. Practically rebelling about your own advice.

If you read my posts, you'll know in August 2012 I came off the pill as me and my hubby decided to try for baby number two. Since then I've not had a period and my small boobs have became even smaller. I used to joke how fab it would be not to have periods but now they have gone I feel like I'm less of a women, as if I've been stripped of my femininity. Knowing my body isn't working as it should makes me feel like a failure as a women. I feel insecure, ugly and frustrated that I did everything I was suppose to do health wise and this has happened. I gave up of most of the junk food, started introducing all the foods I should be in my palette - good fats, lots of greens and so fourth and cooking from scratch and yet my body seems to have stopped working??! How? I lived on rubbish before, never exercised or made anything that didn't come from a microwave practically and everything stops working. I feel p*ssed off.

When we were trying for my daughter I was very unhealthy and yet I literally fell pregnant straight away. I can cope with the not falling pregnant, I believe what is meant to be will be. That's not what's depressing me. I know I'm blessed to already be  a mum, but I'm really not coping well with feeling as though my body is not doing what it should be. I feel as though my body is damaged, like everything has just stopped and I've became a little girl again. I feel insecure and sad, trying to put on a brave face. Making a joke about it and being brave for a week, but then spending the following week in tears, followed by picking myself up again over and over and now I'm just exhausted with it. I feel like I'm a burden on everyone, just moaning everyday and draining the life out of people with my constant need to talk about it. 

I just want a break from worrying about it. I just want everything to return to normal. I just want to be healthy. Physically and mentally and I don't feel I'm either.

The truth is I have a really unhealthy relationship with food and I'm really working on this, but I really just want to be able to say I have all this willpower and I don't slip up. I wouldn't say I'm a perfectionist with every aspect of life, but on the things that I feel really passionate about I am. Good nutrition and health is something I want to campaign all families to be, especially mums getting back in shape so it's a real bug bearer for me when I get it so wrong. I get obsessed trying to be perfect with my food which isn't achievable permanently so of course I slip up, which is followed by my attitude of sod it I'm messed up now so bring on the cookies....all of them.  The binge is later followed by guilt, feeling low and those emotions are followed by more comfort eating. It's a viscous circle. I pick myself up and get it all under control then all it takes is for a incident to happen outside my control and I again I think stuff it and hunt out bad food. There is nothing wrong with eating naughty foods in control, my problem is I don't. I then wake up the next morning feeling sick thinking about how much I ate before going to bed last night, so I then feel all this pressure to be perfect all day.

As I writing this, I'm thinking no wonder my body system isn't working as it should be. I feel annoyed with myself. I want to be able to eat a biscuit, cheese or whatever I fancy without worrying because I've kept in balance. I want to be able to not let it spiral out of control.

The truth is I guess I was and still am a bit vain as much as it pains me to say it. Nobody wants to be any of those things.I thought when I got to my desired dress size which I've now achieved I'd be happier, but I'm not. In fact quite the opposite. The fact of the matter is I'm driven by appearance. All I really want is to be healthy, eat really high nutritionist foods and feel and look good. The reality is eating healthy and keeping everything in check will and does get you into shape. I know because I got fitter, lose weight and became stronger. The problem is I forgot to see it and then sabotaged my own efforts. I instead hear the voices of people who said 'I can't really tell you've lost weight, I bet you've never had a problem staying in shape or I think you look too skinny now'. That's all I heard. They say 100 people can say something nice and all it takes is 1 person to say something that upsets you and that's all you remember. It's true. I wish I could say sod what other people think of what I look like because I think I look good, but I can't. I feel an enormous amount of pressure to look a certain way because I'm an instructor. The reason I feel like this is because I literally hate instructors that are underweight or overweight or just unfit due to the fact they just don't actually give a sh*t, yet take your money and preach to you about what you should and shouldn't eat or do. Or the distributors with they wonder diet plans, pills and shakes that are also unfit. It your going to sell good health then bloody be it! Seriously is that too much to ask? If you truly believe doing something or taking something has all these benefits then why aren't you doing it yourself? Why aren't you a healthy size or fitness level? Sure they will be some with genuine reasons why they'd not, perhaps they've just started out or medical reasons but the majority don't actually give a toss and just want your money, pure and simple. Now the painful part, I'm no better. None what so ever. I'm became so obsessed trying to look a certain way, I'm now battling body image demons once again. It's hardly a healthy campaign.

A few times now friends have mentioned to be about taking the kids swimming and all I think is 'how am I going to get out of this'?. In my head I think ' I can't do that, I can't risk bumping into someone who might no I'm an instructor and let them see me in my swim wear, what if they think 'she's got a crap body for an instructor, I'm not going to her class'.

The truth is I know deep down what I should really think is 'so frigging what if they do'?!. Who cares if they think I'm too skinny, too flabby, have too much cellulite or the opposite and think you look good. What someone else thinks shouldn't really matter. What I think does. So what is the truth. The truth is I just want to look in the mirror and think yep looking good. The reality is I just see the not so perfect bits probably like most women do, which is really sad. I really want to help all women feel beautiful, but I can't do that until I feel that way too. I want to feel great and then shout about it and not give a monkeys if people think 'wow she loves herself', because seriously it must be great to feel that way. Not arrogant but content. Sounds bliss and rare and I want to change this.

I exercise, I eat healthy meals, I drink water over fizzy crap. I'm a healthy fitness level and size. The only unhealthy thing about me is I binge eat. I binge because I get depressed about my image, I get depressed about my image because it's not perfect. I believe it will never be perfect so I think might as well eat shit then, because of course that is the logical answer lol.  In all seriousness though I know this is unhealthy. This is what I'm going to stop. I'm going to work on the bigger picture. I'm going to treat the inside.  I simply cannot control how people perceive me. I could have the best body in the world and somebody would feel repulsed by it. I need to stop trying to be the picture of perfect health and just be happy with how I am. That is healthy. That is what I want my daughter to be. That is what I want for the people I wish to help to feel, healthy but content with their imperfections.. Not for them to have model figures but to be a healthy shape and feel good about themselves. I'm going to start by quitting the binge eating and focusing on body confidence. I will pluck up the courage to do that photoshoot I mentioned earlier this year, I'm just not ready yet. My next challenge is to get ready for this, but not in the way I was planning, which was by trying to get more toned and improve by body more 1st. I decided I need to be contented just the way I am and to do a photoshoot the way I am now. I will never be the way I envisioned and that's OK, because I'm working on my next healthy step which is be confidence with how I am.  I am imperfectly perfect and I will stand proud and do this shoot. Scary.com wish me luck!

Diagnosed Depressed

I've been trying to write a post for a while now, 3 months in fact but I hadn't made it a commitment until about 2 weeks ago to write one. A fortnight ago it had occurred to me that I was much more motivated as well as happy when I was finding the time to blog, making the time for it rather than saying I didn't have time. I was making the time as if it was essential back then. My blog was new and I was ambitious about its role to play in my health journey.  So in the last few weeks I've made the time to sit down and start to write blog posts again. The problem is they have all been deleted..... over and over again. Every time I've started they have all followed a pattern where negatively has crept into the post so I'd begin again. I'm always frank in my posts but I never wish to be draining, so self hating posts is something that simply doesn't fit the bill. As an instructor my desire is always to motivate so not being able to post anything positive has left me feeling frustrated. 

This morning I had an appointment at the doctors to discuss why my periods have stopped, it's been 7 months now. Now it's probably nothing to worry about I came off the pill and then they stopped which happens to many women, but as it's now over 6 months they have to be sure it's nothing to cause concern. I've now had blood tests (all fine, yay!) and will soon be having a scan to be certain everything is just taking it's time to return to normal and no underlying health issues. Anyway the shock came because I went to discuss this and I ended up coming out having being diagnosed with depression. I knew I'd been feeling low, I knew my mood was up and down and my eating habits had been shameful, but until this point I was in denial telling myself it was all hormonal imbalances from coming off the pill. Even when the doctor was asking questions I knew what she was getting at and I just wanted her to stop discussing my mood and get to the bottom of why I wasn't regular anymore. I didn't want her to dismiss this so I kept trying to push for her to look more into this and tried to play down how my mood had been. The painful truth is I wanted something to blame for my absent periods and I didn't want it to be a mental health issue. The doctor however knew and had my best interests, because as I well know stress and depression followed by bad nutrition which starts from these issues can play havoc with you. It can also affect menstruating. It's a stupid situation to get yourself in because stressing about your lack of cycle when your trying to conceive makes it less likely for them to return therefore less likely to conceive. Depression has caused me to binge on junk and junk food can affect your mood and stress cycles. 

I've suffered with depression before so I was very much like 'I'm fine' (which I am), but only when she asked me to complete the depression assessment and there it was in front of me in black and white I knew I was in fact depressed. I felt myself feeling a little teary reading the questions and thinking yes, yes, yes to nearly all of them and realising that not only am I saying yes to just about everything, but I'm also feeling this way nearly every day.  Having good days and bad days and good weeks and bad weeks but on the whole feeling sad most of the time. I've been feeling this way for quite some time now, but I was determined not to label myself as 'depressed' and shrugging it off not wanting to mock people who are going through much more severe issues than me. I really convinced myself I wasn't depressed purely because I don't feel down everyday and because I can say confidently I ain't about to pop a load of pills, I've been there too but that was a long time ago.  I know people going through much worse and I've also felt much worse in the past.  The true is I'm just on a rocky road and I can either accept it and be brave and say yes I'm a depressed or bury my head in the sand, let it get worse until I can no longer cope with in on my own. I've been there, got the T.Shirt and don't ever wanna go back. 

As I've had it on a extreme level in the pass when others aren't on that wave length I've  ashamed to say I've probably dismissed their feelings too quickly. Until today I always felt that people throw around the fact they are depressed so loosely, either using it as an excuse not to work or saying they are depressed when in fact they are just a little down. I felt to say you were depressed was  almost poking fun of of those who are really suffering. I was naive in my thoughts on this. The fact of the matter is unless you've experienced a real traumatic incident that suddenly happen to cause your depression it's probably built up very slowly from feeling a little blue to full on severe I need some help depression. 

On the scale I'm number 17 which is classed as moderately severe depression. I'm lucky it's not severe but I'm also aware I felt low 6 months ago and I now feel much worse so I'm ready to accept that I'm depressed. I'm also sick of feeling this way. It's a burden, it's tiring and it masks all the good in your life.It's selfish, it doesn't really give a dam that it impacts on your family and friends too and not just you.  It allows you to feel you've failed and that your ugly, useless and pointless.  Trivial and pathetic things have lend me to be here. My life is pretty good. I have a loving husband, friends, family and most importantly in my life a wonderful daughter. I feel annoyed with myself for not appreciating all the things I do have. I feel like I do appreciate these things, but then I think clearly I don't or why would I feel the way I do most days. Then the guilt sets in. The truth is I know why I feel the way I do, it's not the time to discuss it yet but it's something outside my control and something considering all the wonderful people I have in my life that shouldn't matter but to me it does. It matters a lot and inside it's eating away at me. 

I don't need or want empathy. I don't feel I'm the minority. I actually feel like I'm one of many just going through an imperfect time that has gone on and gone and it's time to say goodbye to those feelings, hopefully sometime soon. I said in the beginning of this post two things. Firstly I wanted all my posts to be positive and secondly I'm been struggling to write positive posts hence why posts have been not existent. Then I decided this post could be positive and also be a published , because it's honest. Sure it's perhaps negative but with a positive intention (still counts, surely?) . This post is to mark the start of me facing the problem, sharing it and not allowing it to take over anymore. Depression will always be taboo if people avoid talking about. I won't be the one to hide it but to fight it. 

Kicking off 2013 with a terrifying goal, wish me luck!

New Year and most of us are making resolutions and I wish you loads of luck, but this year it's not for me. I do it every year and I can't actually remember what I've ever made a resolution about. This year in all honestly I don't want it, I don't do failure well. I hate losing and I also don't want to give anything else up. Perhaps that means I don't truly want to succeed or I would make a resolution and stick to it. However I don't feel that way, I feel as though I've came along way and lately as I mentioned in my latest post I'm less motivated. Generally January is when the majority of us are probably most motivated, but not me I'm feeling contented about the way I look and it's nice to feel this way. Sure I'm worried I've been slack in the last two weeks and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't concerned my results could start slipping away if I don't get my bum into gear, but ultimately I'm thinking although my results may not be jaw dropping they have been achieved through setting goals I'm ready for. 

I came up fizzy drinks and sugar in my tea 2 years ago and sweets (except chocolate) last March and do I miss them now, not even a teeny bit! Did I miss them in the beginning of doing so, well it's sugar and it's addictive so hell yeah like you wouldn't believe! I did it though and haven't looked back, I feel proud of this and only I know how hard they were for me to give up. 

I've now gone down from a size 14 to a size 8 and some may think that's not an achievement as I wasn't overweight before, but you know what I'm really proud of myself. Not for being a size 8 as that was never my intention, I was happy being a size 10 to 12 as long as I was toned. No I'm proud as I can say without any guilt that I did it the right way. I didn't cheat with a fad diet or take slimming pills. Nor did I do it overnight only to put it back on. No I made little changes and kept it off. I stumbled at times, felt fat although I've never been and then binged and felt sorry for myself, but then I snapped out of it and started again and didn't wait till bloody Monday! I exercised regularly, even when I really couldn't be arsed and it was cold and after I felt better. I ate seeds, which when your a fussy bugger is an achievement, HUGE in fact - I felt like a bird, but then I embraced it as they are uber good for me and I want to healthy, energised and refreshed and so I learnt to appreciate these little gems. I switched from black tea to green tea and now I prefer it. I made lifestyle changes. I made a commitment and I'll continue to make them. I'm sure I'll gain again over this relapse lately and lack of motivation, but that's alright because I know I won't allow myself to go back to those old habits that I've kicked butt with. I prefer the new changes now, they are my healthy habits and not a burden but a pleasure. Life should be a pleasure and that's why I'm not making anymore currently. I should be giving up the treats that have recently crept into my diet way too much and I will, but not just yet. Right now I need to just feel like I can still have some pleasure  in food and not feel restricted. I've got to the point where I was worrying about every tiny thing I was putting into my mouth and getting obsessed, this isn't healthy either. So right now I just need to relax a bit and remember that if I want results I have to take baby steps that are achievable.

So what's my goal for 2013.....to do a photshoot! More specifically of my tummy. You maybe thinking, big deal but to me it's MASSIVE! Although there are some photos of me with my midsection out these all have one thing in common.....my hubby has taken them. When your hubby takes the photo you can then make him keep retaking it without worrying your being annoying until you find one that looks alright. You can be bossy and say 'not that angle my stretch marks look bad or I don't look very slim from that angle'. OK to some extent you can probably do this with a photographer, but would I ever NOPE! I'd be too intimated too. Letting a stranger see you mummy tummy is one thing, to photograph is quite another and to try and tell a professional how to do there job is really quite something. The reason I guess it's so scary for me is 'what if they photograph me and think Jesus her gut is a bit crap for an instructor who's supposedly helping mums tone up'. I'd feel gutted, ashamed and like I'd let people down. So why put myself through it? Why, because I get jealous of others who have the confidence to do it. Yes jealously is a sin and all that and I'm not proud of it but it's true, I dream of being that confident. I don't wish to dream anymore. I want to live the dream. I want to be that confident. I don't know if I'll ever have the confidence to instruct a class with my tum on display but this is a step in the right direction. So watch out for this crazy lady's tum sometime in 2013 ;)

What goals are you going to achieve in 2013?

Love Miss Work it Baby x x x x

PS Happy Healthy New Rear ;p

The Secret I've Told Everyone!

If you read my blogs you'll know that 2012 wasn't a great year for us and that only gives you an insight on what I feel comfortable to share, but what 2012 has taught me is life is too short. Whilst this has been a tough year for us we've faced absolutely nothing compared to what some friends and their loved ones are having to cope with. It's these times you have to put things into perspective and take a minute to realise how lucky you are. I'm truly blessed to have my daughter, hubby, family and friends around me, but I'm also guilty of forgetting this and not picking myself up. 

I'm impatient and like to plan everything. So when things happen outside my control I struggle. In 2012 one thing after another happened outside my control and I had a mini melt down shall we say.

Anyway one thing I learnt from this is I can't plan everything! The timing will never be perfect. Life isn't without it's ups and downs and nothing goes without it's hiccups.  You have to find a way through it and sometimes you can search and search and there just aren't any answers.

I've always said I'll like to plan two children and I also said I'd like a 3-5 year age gap, but seeing as my daughter is 5 years in June this isn't going to happen. We hadn't started trying sooner because I wanted to have my business more established before trying for baby number 2. I wanted everything in place so that when I needed to take a little time out on maternity my business would still be there when I returned. 

I know I say it repeatedly but I love what I do, but lately I've started to love it a little less all the time and the reason for that is I've put my hold life on hold for the business. I stopped socialising as much, thinking I needed to be working on the business more and feeling guilty if I wasn't working 24/7 on it. More importantly I put my dream of having this perfect age gap on hold for it. Then when my our personal circumstances meant the business had to take a back seat it left me feeling angry that my business is still not established and it hasn't been because I've had another child. It's been because of things outside my control.

So as you've probably of guessed already our secret is that we are trying for baby number 2. I came of the pill in August and I planned to tell no-one as I'd like for it to be a secret till I'm 12 weeks pregnant, and for Pie to be the 1st one we tell when we know everything is OK. So far though I've got so excited about the thought of extending our family I think I've just about told everyone I know and so I thought I might as well put into out there now, hence the blog post. I should be keeping it quiet as once people know your trying they are naturally going to ask 'are you pregnant yet,' since I can't lie for toffee this will be a problem since I don't wish to announce it till I'm 12 weeks pregnant. However I need to talk about it, it's eating me up. The world of trying for a baby is a lonely place and I feel like I need to just rant about how I'm feeling in the hope I feel better to be frank. 

I've always been on the pill, well since I was 14 years with the exception of coming off to try for my daughter and then then going straight back on it. So I've been on the pill roughly 12 years with a 11 month gap when I we had my daughter. When we tried the 1st time round it happened no joke 1st time to my husbands disappointment who wanted to practise some more ;). So whilst I kept saying next time it could take ages as I've seen the struggles some of my friends have faced trying to conceive, I  in all honestly deep down believed as I'm fitter than I was when I had Pie that in would just happen straight away again. 

However it's now been 4 months and don't think for one minute I'm trying to be disrespectful as I know people try for 10 years plus without anything happening, but I'm struggling that nothing is happening. I don't just mean I'm not falling pregnant I mean I've been feeling crap since coming of the pill and that doesn't show any signs of improving. I'm up and down everyday and it's not settling down. One day I feel fine and the next day I'm in tears over nothing, irritable and hating the world. I've had no period since August and I'm all over the place. I feel exhausted all the time and even lightheaded sometimes - it's like a pregnancy with no baby. I start to get excited that I'm pregnant only to be disappointed that I'm not. I know that I'm unbelievably lucky to already be a mum and I don't take that for granted, but when your broody and believe your pregnant and feel pregnant only to find out your not it can pull on the heart strings and make you emotional. I been to the doctors and basically just been told that my hormones are likely to be all over the place since coming of the pill and there really isn't nothing they can do. I've been told to go back in March if my periods haven't returned and they'll do some tests then just to check everything is normal. 

So it's just a waiting game now for everything to return to normal. It can't come quick enough, I just want to feel myself again. I haven't been helping matters though, as you may of noticed I haven't been doing blog posts on here recently and the reason is I'm so shattered that I'm just not motivated and since I can't seem to motivate myself it's hard to write a post that will help and inspire others to be healthy. The lack of motivation means I haven't been eating a healthy palette and quite the opposite in fact. I feel annoyed with myself as I truly believe that the better you eat the better you feel.  I know this is the case as one of the things the nutritionist discussed with us as part of the Weight Management Programme is changes to your nutrition can help with hormones levels and so I implemented her advice, I soon felt a great deal better. I really had no idea how a few changes could help with PMT, depression and so fourth ,but then more bad news came and Christmas and I found temporary comfort in junk food.

So how am I feeling after a 2 week binge?! More low, tired, bloated, heavier and annoyed with myself. I feel sickened with myself when I think about what I've been putting into my body recently. So what am I going to do? Sort it out! I need to stop feeling sorry for myself and take better care of myself. This week I'm going to start exercising again and eating better. I'm going to start posting again and will keep you updated with my progress. I'm not going to get my motivation back overnight, but I'm at least going to try and get it back. Wish me luck.

The Sugar Challenge Results When You Have Zero Motivation!

I did 4 weeks without sugar and was so pleased with my results, but then I slowly let my results go and discovered the challenge trap. So I decided I needed to do it again for 6 weeks. I've now done the 6 weeks without sweet treats, but as I said I'd always be honest about my highs and lows I have to tell you that I did fail this time.

When your not feeling yourself it's hard to keep motivated. We've had a difficult year and it's finally taken it's toll on me and for the past couple of months I've became increasingly low. I don't like to use the word depressed and it's something thrown around way too easily and having suffered before I'm not feeling like I was then. However it's a little uneasy to say and feels a bit cringed, but to be raw I'm a bit sad at the moment. 

 

The beginning of this year we found out we'd have to move as our landlord required the property back. Both me and my hubby are self employed and neither of us have been going long enough that even with excellent references we still don't look appealing on paper to agents. Throw into the works my daughter was going to be starting School so finding a rental property in budget within a good catchment made finding a new home a nightmare to be polite. After 4 months of constantly missing out we found a property and we were all set to move into, but 3 days before the move in date we were told the property had failed safety inspections and we could no longer move in. The estate agents took our money as argued it was non refundable, but after fighting we got half back. It was an awful time but I've always believed in Karma and on this occasion it's worked. The estate agents are currently in the papers after being charged with a £4 million mortgage fraud deal. However the outcome for us meant us living with the hubby's parents for 2 months and since this is 45 miles away and it's in the countryside I felt cut off from the world. We car share so hubby was always working and with the awful Summer I was just stuck in watching the rain everyday. The business suffered, I couldn't work on routines properly as his parents own and live in a B & B so I couldn't really play music and be jumping around. The Internet was so slow with being in a rural area so doing things online was very frustrating. When we finally got moved back,we were lucky though and got a place we are over the moon to call home, but the previous tenants decided to damage the plumbing and wreck the place before we moved in so it wasn't exactly a smooth move. I also had my Cheerobics® training to do a few weeks after the move and with all the stress I was feeling very under prepared knocking my confidence. My daughter started School this year so that's been emotional and hard to get used too. I miss her silly amounts.

A lack of working on the business this past year has meant that my business is now struggling to stay a float and I'm having to make the decision to keep going or walk away. This is causing no end to making me feel low because quite obviously it's always sad when you have to make this decision, but it's more than that I'm finding it a struggle on a personal level too. I'm totally torn with what to do and this just isn't me, I totally decisive and always know what I want to do. For the 1st time in ages I actually just don't know the answer and this is driving me insane and causing me to feel very stressed. There's been times in the past when I've had to decide whether to give up but I've always known in the back on my mind that I haven't really wanted to because I believe in my vision for the business. This time it's different because I've lost self believe in the fact that my USP is something that is wanted, I generally just don't know anymore. My heart says keep the business going because I love instructing (which was a surprise), I love the group of women that attend (again I'm surprise I've met such a lovely bunch), I love getting fit which I never thought would happen and I generally would never wish to come out the industry now. I'm so pleased with how much fitter and healthier I am now and I'm proud of the fact I qualified in something I never really thought I was going to pass in. The fact that shy old me managed to stand up in front of people and shout still shocks me but that's just one side. The other side is my my head which says quit now and stop being daft and kidding myself. I just keep thinking I've been going two years and I usually only have about 6 in my class. I gain someone new and lose 2 more it seems and generally it's for lovely reasons but things outside of my control - they get a job and have to work when my class is on, or have another baby etc. I just can't seem to get the interest and realistically in these times I don't think I can compete with the market. There are two gyms offering £10 a month with classes included and there is absolutely no way on earth I could offer close to that. Then they are bootcamps that whilst are more expensive than me they do offer more classes within their package. Which again I can't do because of childcare and the cost of doing so.  Then they are the trendy classes out there like Zumba which I don't like so there is no way I can offer this as it always comes off it your not passionate. Again I tried to combat this by offering Cheerobics® which seems to be getting a lot of interest, but as people need to book in advance (so I can be sure they'll have pom poms) this seems to put people off and then they either don't book in or book but never turn up for the 1st class to even see if they like it. Maybe it's the time of year or maybe I'm just trying to make myself feel better for a business that is drowning. I've lost self believe in my abilities as an instructor which I feel is effecting my classes and the business. I feel physically fit but emotionally exhausted. The truth is I think I need to call a day on the business but I haven't got the courage to do so yet as quite frankly I love it and will miss the class, business and people dearly. So the story continues until I make a decision I guess :( .........

So how did this affect the challenge and how did I fail? Well I just physically couldn't seem to get into it and give it my all. I didn't have any sweets (haven't done since Spring - go me! ;)), chocolate, biscuits, cake, fizzy drinks (gave those up two years ago), squash etc etc but I did eat way too much processed foods some days which defeats the object of quitting sweet treats since quite often these foods are loaded with sugar and generally just unhealthy. My problem is I lose motivation because I do believe all in moderation so I start to tell myself it's OK to eat these things within limits. The problem with that is the amount of sugar you need in your diet is so small and as sugar seems to be in everything (even the unexpected) I'm probably having my healthy limit unknownly easily anyway. The other problem is the more I have the more I want. I have a bit then before I know it I'm on a sugar binge and eat so much I feel sick. 

So why put myself through the stress eh? I'm really happy with my size and weight but I'm not at all pleased with my teeth - had so many fillings that I feel embarrassed.  Nor and I happy with my cellulite and lack of muscle definition. I know my problem is still eating lack of nutritional foods and eating for pleasure things that are terrible for my health........ but is it is all too easy to beat yourself up and stress which is just as bad when your trying to reach your healthy goals? So instead I'm trying to be proud of the fact I'm a ridiculous amount healthier than I was 2 years ago when I was living on fizzy drinks and cheesy chips, a load better than I was a year ago and some what better that I was 6 months ago. I can tick so many boxes of things I've achieved.This is something I'd of never ticked off had it not been for the business. So for every failure you've made along the journey to health you've probably learnt and achieved something great too. I'd never done these things if I hadn't started my business, the business made me want to practise what I preach to members.

So instead of punishing yourself and yo yo dieting why not just make yourself a check list of those addictions/bad habits you wish to combat and focus on one at a time. Whilst it takes time it works as there is absolutely no rigging way I'm going to go back to the lifestyle I had two years ago, I cringe just thinking about it and the thought of my daughter copying terrifies me. Motivation will come and unfortunately it will go , but when it does don't give up just remember what you've already achieved and visualise what you want.  Then make a plan to which habit you'll combat 1st. Focus on the positive and believe you can achieve your goal. So get working on that checklist. Tick off any healthy swaps, weight loss, exercise you now do and so fourth it's all relevant.

 

Good luck with your goals.

Love Miss Work it Baby x x x

Ditch The Scales For Charity!

We all have bad health habits that sometimes seem impossible to break, but what about if you have a much bigger problem you wished to succeed for? The issue I'm talking about is bullying and child sexual abuse. Helping a charity that is committed to helping keep children safe from abuse is much more rewarding than seeing the number on the scales decrease, as lovely as that is! So I suggest you ditch the scales and commit to your goal for Kidscape.
 

Kidscape is the first charity in the UK established specifically to prevent bullying and child sexual abuse. They believe that protecting children from harm is key and feel that their work is vital given the frightening statistics that:

•Each year 10-14 youth suicides are directly attributed to bullying (The Home Office)
•Bullied children are 6 times more likely to contemplate suicide than their non-bullied counterparts
•1 in 12 children are badly bullied to the point that it affects their education, relationships and even their prospects for jobs in later life
•66% of paedophiles are known to the child

Kidscape works UK-wide to provide individuals and organisations with practical skills and resources necessary to keep children safe from harm. The Kidscape staff equips vulnerable children with practical non-threatening knowledge and skills in how to keep themselves safe and reduce the likelihood of future harm. This is why I wish to support this charity.

My Proposal to you:

Please consider either option.

A) You commit to the 'QUIT CHALLENGE'. Meaning you quit something you love/rely on for a minimum of a week, but ideally a month. You choose something that will better your health for your own personal self motivation and well-being. Choosing to give up something that will be a challenging for you so friends and family wish to back you.
 

B) You get behind us and choose to sponsor someone who is doing the 'Quit Challenge'. You sponsor them a recommended £1 donation for every week they complete the challenge and a extra £1 if they do a full calender month so a total of £5 for the whole month. Obviously higher donations are delightful, but every little helps so even smaller contributions are greatly received. You choose what you wish to donate :)

 

Why have I chosen to do this now?

I've wanted for a long time to be involved in helping children suffering, but recently I watched a video recorded by Amanda Todd not long before she took her own life. Not enough was done to help her and it's easy to say we would of done something had we known her, but that doesn't quite cut it. The best we can do now is to try and do something for the next victim.

 

 

My past and desire to help people achieve health goals makes me very passionate to get this project of the grown.

How will it work?

Once I have people wishing to be involved I'll get a fundraising page set up. I'll the add the individuals taking part in the desciption and their challenges and you invite friends/family to pop over to the page and sponsor you.

Who will benefit?

The charity, the kids and their parents as well as you improving your own health.

Ideas for the challenge:

♥ Give up the car
♥ Quit smoking
♥ Quit Alcohol
♥ Quit sweet treats or something specific if you have an addiction to something particular i.e chocolate, fizzy drinks etc

When will we commence?

I hope to start middle the of November, but obviously this depends entirely on when I have everything in place to make it happen.

This is what I need:

♥ People to take part in the Quit Challenge
♥ People to sponsor those taking part in the challenge
♥ Businesses to offer their services complimentary - literature designed or printed, raffle prizes to further help fundraising or blogging/promoting about the fundraising campaign etc.

Please leave me a comment if you wish to support this project so I can get it off the ground.

Hoping to make this a big success,

Miss Work it Baby x x x

Lady Gaga Battles With Her Weight and Nicole Scherzinger Admits She Battled Bulimia.

Lady Gaga has won many awards as well as being ranked as one of the most most influential people of the decade and recently became the first person in the world to pass the 30 million followers threshold on Twitter. However recently Gaga came under attack about apparently gaining 2 stone. It wasn't that long ago she came under attack for being too thin and it was thought she had an eating disorder. 

Nicole Scherzinger has now came forward and admitted she was Bulimic whilst in the Pussycat Dolls. 

I've never personally been overweight but yes I have to admit I have been depressed about my weight in the past. I also know people very close to my heart who've suffered an eating disorder. 

When I was at School there was a girl who was overweight and a boy she fancied at the time called her a 'FAT COW'. In the coming months she lost a lot of weight and about a year later she was drastically under weight. 

Recently I was saddened to see a photo posted on Facebook of a bloke who wasn't the typical stereotype of beauty. A bloke who'd taken the courage to join a dating site and upload his photo. This photo had been then copied and pasted on Facebook just to mock him. This is cruel. He may never find out, but what if and I know it's unlikely he does?

The pararazzi and unrealistic images of celebs who have been photoshoped are often blamed for causing people to battle with body image demons, but are we to blame too? 

Social Media has became a platform for bullying. I follow many celebrities on Facebook and they simply can't post a photo without someone telling them they are too skinny, too fat, ugly, having a bad hair day, a chav and the list just doesn't seem to end. Some say this is the price of fame, but if you wouldn't say this to someones face (and I really hope you wouldn't) why is online acceptable?

Lady Gaga hit back and posted a photo of herself in just her underwear and has started a campaign ' "Body Revolution'.  Fans from across the internet are invited to post pictures of themselves online and celebrate their "triumph over insecurities." To date, thousands  have took part.

I believe the problem is everyone wants a quick fix, people don't always seem to care about health but just looking good. I admit I used to be one of those, but becoming a parent changed me. I know longer wanted to battle with body image anymore.When results are slow it's when we start to go on a binge or start a fad diet. If our main goal was all about health we'd keep going because progress is almost immediate when this is your goal.  If one day you eat junk food all day and the next day you eat well balanced meals and leave the junk behind your already being healthier. You may not be any lighter yet but you are in fact nourishing and loving your body. You may at times stumble and lose motivation, but if it's not all about the scales and in fact about being healthy you'll start back. 

I hate with a passion when people assume because I'm eating something nourishing I'm trying to lose weight. I don't try and give up the bad food to shed weight (I'm happy with my size) I do it because I want to be fitter, stronger and slightly more defined. I have no intentions of trying to be lighter. 

Self acceptance is so important and I do in all honestly still get down (only occasionally now) when I'm not getting the exact results I visualise, but I have accepted now that 'I'm a pear, I'll never be that perfect hour glass and my boobs are small. I have stretch marks and they'll never go' but my imperfections are perfectly mine and I do not need to change them to be beautiful. 

I urge and plead to everyone to just be healthy, list your imperfections and embrace them and make it your goal to one day post a photo of yourself in your underwear/bikini and accept the way you are. 

Love Miss Work it Baby x x x x

5 Tips To Fight Cellulite!

I have cellulite, not as much as before that's for sure but unfortunately I do still have cellulite. This pains me as I've lost weight and work-out so what am I doing wrong? Well I started to do a little research. The truth is quite depressing because even the most beautiful frames still seem to suffer too. Britney Spears and Tulisa to name a very few have all been caught on camera with cellulite. This quite pathetically makes me feel better. Now if your reading this you most probably have cellulite too. Apparently 80 to 90% of women do. The truth is nearly all women have cellulite and there is still a lot of debate on what actually causes cellulite since underweight and overweight people get the dreaded orange peel skin. Cellulite is defined in the dictionary as dimply skin caused by uneven fat deposits beneath the surface. Many experts believe that as cellulite is found commonly in very skinny women as well as the curvaceous that the problem is toxins. Chemicals ingested from birth control,  food chain, water supply, and pollutants breathed in from the environment.  The theory is that the body stores toxins in cells near the skin’s surface where they can do the least damage. Others are sceptical about this theory. One thing they all seem to agree on though is a poor diet plays a huge role in the cause of cellulite. This for me is very true. If I'm to be very honest to you when I lost my weight over 2 years ago now I did it through yes improving my diet and through a lot of exercise but to be truthful my diet still wasn't great. I was still not eating anywhere near as healthy as I should of been. Which is one of the reasons I started this blog so I could start my journey battling this so when I tell people to eat healthy my conscience is clear.

 

In the last year and especially in the last 6 months I've became some what more serious about nutrition and in fact passionate to know more. I've became quite fascinated in the subject. The reason for this is whilst I lost my weight I never became truly satisfied with my results. The more research I did the more apparent it became that getting the diet right was key. I was in denial trying to outweigh bad food with plenty of exercise. The truth is it doesn't work. Yes exercise is amazing for getting results but on it's own you won't truly get where you want to be and vice versas. You need to do both so you tone, lose weight and actually start to feel better - less tired, more energy, stronger and fitter. If you do just one you may lose weight but your unlikely to become defined or get as fit as you'd like.

So the big question is 'How do we get rid of the cottage cheese look'?!

 

The truth is massages, body bushing and creams can help temporary but results won't last as they don't deal with the cause of the problem. So these are ideal methods if you want to improve the look of cellulite for an occasion or holiday but if you wish to tackle the issue permanently you need to work on the inside. I know this works as surprise surprise my cellulite didn't change when I lost weight but  in the last 6 months since leading a much healthier palette it's finally improved. Not gone (but to be honest I'm still battling with the healthy eating lifestyle), but what I can say as it's definitely improved so here's my personal advice.

 

 

 

 

My top tips:

 

1) Look at what chemicals you putting into your body?  Make sure you've done your research on any supplements your putting into your body too. Bare in mine your birth control maybe making the condition worse. I was quite depressed to find out my contraceptive pill could be aggravating the problem.

 

2) I really try and drink 6-8oz glasses of water a day as well as green tea as it's full of anti-oxidants.  These are said to help flush out any excess sodium that causes fluid retention.

 

3) I eat regularly but I've tried to give up the fatty, sweet and processed foods. Basically the junk food.  How you lose weight is key to minimising cellulite since mentioned earlier even the very slim can get cellulite. So the fad diets will only be making it worse even if they are successful with helping you drop some weight.  Crash dieting can actually make cellulite worse by reducing skin’s elasticity, making more of those little puckers noticeable.

 

4) I Enjoy foods with essential fatty acids. These can  help by strengthening the connective tissues around fat cells, thereby helping to reduce cellulite. Sources include olive oil, flax seed oil and fish oil. Onions can also help as they help release water build-up from skin cells.

 

5) Enjoy protein and aim to eat three small portions a day.   Protein can help as it contains albumin, which helps absorb excess fluid. Water retention can be part of the cellulite problem. So add small portions of fish, nuts, beans etc each day. Quinoa is something I've introduced into my diet too.

I hope you find my tips useful,

Love Miss Work it Baby x x x

Abs in Process!

So if you follow my blog you'll know all my goals. The big goal for me is I want some definition in my stomach. I've been aiming to eat clean 80% of the time to achieve this and susprisly loving it. I don't feel at all deprived. It really works for me. I finally feel like I'm cracking it with the healthy lifestyle instead of looking for quick fixes. I'm doing it all properly now and when I feel myself getting discouraged with the progress or my failures I remind myself of how far I've came with lifestyle changes. It's so easy to look in the mirror and feel disappointed but results do come, so it's best to focus on 'am I healthier than before?', and as long as the answer is yes you should be proud and those results will follow.  

So here is a photo of me from yesterday taken from a screen shot of a video I was recording (I have to do a video for an exam I'm doing in Cheerobics encase your wondering, plus another one of my goals is to evenually do home work-out videos so I'm trying to learn some confidence in front of the camera ;-) ). 

Now my goal wasn't just to get definition in my stomach but more inmportantly the lower part so still work to be done, but on the whole I'm really pleased as I feel I'm seeing a real difference. 

I'm also coming to the end of week 1 of no refined sugar and this seems to make a real difference for me, but unlike when I did it before I'm learning from my mistakes and being aware of the trap when the plan comes to an end. 

My current workouts are just a weekly 'Work it Baby' class and 'Cheerobics' practising at the moment. The class and home practising and healthy eating are getting me close to my goal so I'm so chuffed. 

I'm looking forward to hopefully sharing the end result real soon :D 

Love Miss Work it Baby x x x

The Challenge Trap!

If you follow my posts you'll know I set myself challenges including the month I went without refined sugars. I need to do this to keep myself achieving my goals. I'm an emotional eater and I personally believe everything in moderation but quite often I find the whole moderation thing difficult to do. So instead it works for me to set myself cold turkey challenges. This works much better for me as there is no room for 'well I can just have one more as long as I'm good the rest of the week', which then slowly slips out of control. Generally the more I have the more I want and to be quite frank when it comes to food I get quite addicted to the wrong stuff. I never get bored of eating bad food and that's where my problem lies. I eat rubbish for pleasure, boredom, comfort, celebrating as well as when I'm feeling sorry for myself or stressed. I also eat junk when I don't see the results I want quick enough and think what the heck it's not working so I might as well eat what I want anyway.......as if that's gonna help!!

So as you can see this is why a challenge for me is just much more beneficial. Challenges are bloody hard work or it wouldn't be a challenge, but I'd definitely recommend it if you know your not good at the whole moderation thing as there is no room for I'll just have a little as the plan doesn't aloud for this until you finish it. However be warned it's going to take a lot of grit to get through it.

Now for the most important thing before you start....THE TRAP! Are you aware of this when starting any diet or challenge? 

When I finished my last challenge I was so proud of myself that I'd actually achieved it  I felt I deserved a reward. So what did I reward myself with.....the obvious CAKE, CHOCOLATE, PIZZA, POPCORN AND CHEESE! Wait it doesn't stop there this wasn't just one evening but I kept doing it. On and off for about 2 weeks until I finally decided enough was enough and I'd just sabotaged a whole month of bloody hard work. 

You see a diet or challenge is great if your realistic and don't try to convince yourself you can have something naughty because you've just done so well. It's totally pointless and defeats what you'll done so well at. 

There is absolutely nothing wrong with having a treat but it should just be a treat. Not a treat evening or weekend or even a week of booze, takeaways and sweets. In just one evening you can undo all your hard work. Sometimes you can get away with it for quite a while but the truth is eventually it will catch up on you because junk food is addictive. The more you eat the more you want. Basically in the long run you are just making things harder for yourself. Even if your a healthy size you still need to think about what your putting into your body. Bad food will cause you health problems maybe not now but one day. 

Be kind to your body and don't fall into the trap of I know I'm going to a party next week so I'll start my healthy eating after that. Well it's perfectly fine to have the night of but why wait till after? Instead be good up till that occasion then enjoy the special occasion and then get straight back on it. 

Enjoy those times and don't feel guilty, but earn that special occasion if you want to succeed. Have a treat but make sure it's just the one. Thats' what will get you results and keeping them. 

I used to do a treat night and I don't now. I just have a treat when I need one and try to minimise this (it's a working progress to be honest) ,but I'm getting there and it's not about looking at what your still not getting right it's about comparing yourself to how you were. I'm not there completely with the healthy eating but if I compare myself to my food habits a year ago then my palette of food has been amazingly cleaned up. Much more variety, nutritional value and definitely less junk and yes my weight has stayed off even with the slip ups because I always get back onto it. I don't give up on myself. I have a family to think of so my health is important so fighting bad lifestyle demons is a priority. The whole you only live once is true, but I'd rather live a long happy disease free life if I'm fortunate enough to do so and so I'll do what I can to maximise my chances. 

Healthy living is not about perfection but consistency. It's not about feeling deprived but learning to control you addictions first and foremost, because without the addictions and cravings there is no feeling deprived. I gave up fizzy drinks and sugar in my tea a few years ago and it no longer bothers me. It did for a long time but now I couldn't care less, I don't feel I'm missing out in fact I cringe thinking about having either now.  

Watch for your trap and be good to yourself

xxx

The Funny Motivation We All Need!

These both make me chuckle because I've done them, shamefully A LOT! Although on a more serious side (boring I  know), but these hit the nail on the head for me. When I get depressed about not achieving the results I want this is why! I don't give it time and push through. I want results straight away and I'm impatient. When that doesn't happen I think sod it I'll eat cake, it's not working anyway! Or I'll start again on Monday......why? What's wrong with the next day? So I can cheat all weekend and wonder why I'm not achieving? Or I do but then the results slowly slip away. It's good to laugh about your mistakes and learn from them but whilst chuckling over how ridiculous it is that we've all done this, it's now time to look at in on a more serious note and not allow yourself to do this anymore. The only one who can sacrifice your results is YOU! Laugh, love and learn but don't sabotage your own success. 

Wishing you loads of success fighting your emotional eating demons.

xxx